August 4, 2008

Fighting to find mindspace

Not that I do not have time, but not the way I need it to blog. I call it mindspace. Will hit the 'purple patch' of blogging soon though.

I was telling someone the other day that I can sense that I am turning into a lunatic with each day passing. More freaky, more weird than ever before! I find myself laughing more these days, and that's weird because I do not need reasons to laugh. Increasingly, I care less about what I am wearing to where. Carrying myself in a very casual way to lectures. Not really taking care of the 'niceties' and the 'formalities'. Being more volatile and 'unstructured' in the way I am living overall. Something that my parents keep complaining about. In their words, it is not 'disciplined'.

Also, I like doing things that most people believe are 'what-the-fu**' kinds. And I do not really like doing the 'in-things'. I sleep through (literally) the box-office hits in most cases and am excited about a movie that has 11 people watching it on the first day of its release.

I have stopped scolding the batches and keep mocking myself. Was actually dancing in a batch the other day! When was the last time I lost my cool? Can’t remember. And that’s not me. Can’t be. But yet that’s how it is.

I am less nervous about a lot of things. Leave it to the moment in most cases, including my presentations. Doing it more ‘extempore’ than before. The ever-excited wreck I was, am being more laid back these days. Less ‘turned on’ by things that otherwise would have excited me. Talking a lot lesser than before. Discussing a lot lesser than before. Getting out of home a lot lesser than before.

If not anything else, all the above crap might make you believe that I am starting to lose it. If still not convinced, see it to believe it!

11 comments:

D3 said...

Sir,
i used to believe that ur always calm cool and composed, the perfect balance of every good thing.
But u seem to be just like me.....

May be u r not "Go with the flow" kind of people thats why people think "U" r different.
What ever may be the case "We all want our always enthusiastic and zealeous harish sir back"

Diviya said...

Yep, would like to see it, if you ever come to this side of civilization.

Vaidehi said...

U dancing in the class...Now this is something to be seen to be believed!Hehe...

Well, this is not about you 'loosing it', i think you are just going through a rebellious non-comformist phase...Happens to many people...But can bet on that,Nkayites will soon see the prim & proper Harish Sir again.

shilpa said...

Dont worry ,it happens to everyone, find the reason & try to enjoy every moment of life . Thanks & take care

Anonymous said...

u were dancing in the class!cant blive this one.but wud like to mention that i dun think u r weird in doing all those things which u have mentioned.

take care
keep smiling and pls do not change urself

Joamoo said...

harish BABA ki jay ho. :)
The next best thing u should do is go to Himalayas....(after completing our syllabus...:))

U No Hoo said...

Thanks Darshana, be rest assured that nothing has happened to my zeal and enthu.

Diviya, we have too meet sometime soon. Looong overdue.

Prim and proper me.. ooh la la. Thanks Vaidehi!

Thanks for the advice Shilpa!! :)

Thanks Priyanka, as usual.

Akshay, tujhe to class mein dekh lunga! :))

Take care guys..

Anonymous said...

Ye sab thik hain ...... hope tu PICNIC me ye sab NATAK nahi karanewala ....... nahiiii to apane picnic ki lag jayegi aur inturn me aur laks teri laga dengeee ......

so be MAD on the trip like you always dooo ... and do some shopping for the trip ..... take careeeeeeeee

- Romesh SAS

The Smile Trooper said...

Not following the "not so taken" or the socio-conventional paths in life..often make us feel this way. you should just do what your heart desires..and not worry abt being different...or weird.
We all have a little bit of weirdness in us..but our inhibitions keep us at bay..

cheers..

Narayan said...

Sir waiting for ur dance performance in our batch.....;)
and dat long period of not loosing temper broke yesterday coz of our batch.... u were not angry but u were showing anger rite?? :)

U No Hoo said...

Hehe... very true!